Having a laugh?

[djsb]

Just thought I'd post this as it made me smile (copied from another forum I frequent http://mzskorpion.info/phpbb2/viewtopic.php?f=12&t=589)

Canberra, ACT:

Prime minister Juliar Gillard and the Greens are considering sweeping legislation that will provide new benefits for many Australians. The Australians With No Abilities Act (AWNAA) is being hailed as a major legislative goal by advocates of the millions of Australians who lack any real skills or ambition. "Roughly 50 percent of Australians do not possess the competence and drive necessary to carve out a meaningful role for themselves in society," said - Labor senator Steven Conroy. "We can no longer stand by and allow People of Inability (POI) to be ridiculed and passed over. With this legislation, employers will no longer be able to grant special favors to a small group of workers, simply because they have some idea of what they are doing."

In a Parliament house press conference, - Bob Brown - pointed to the success of Australia Post, which has a long-standing policy of providing opportunity without regard to performance. Approximately 74 percent of postal employees lack any job skills, making this agency the single largest Australian employer of Persons of Inability. Private-sector industries with good records of non-discrimination against the Inept include retail sales (72%), the airline industry (68%), and home improvement warehouse stores (65%). At the state government level, the Motor Vehicle Registry also has an excellent record of hiring Persons of Inability (63%).

Under AWNAA, more than 2.5 million mid-level positions will be created, with important-sounding titles but little real responsibility, thus providing an illusory sense of purpose and performance. Mandatory non-performance-based promotions will be given so as to guarantee upward mobility for even the most unremarkable employees. The legislation provides substantial tax breaks to corporations that promote a significant number of Persons of Inability into middle-management positions, and gives a tax credit to small and medium-sized businesses that agree to hire one clueless worker for every two talented hires. Finally, the AWNAA contains tough new measures to make it more difficult to discriminate against the non-abled, banning, for example, discriminatory interview questions such as, "Do you have any skills or experience that relate to this job?"

"As a Non-abled person, I can't be expected to keep up with people who have something going for them,"said Mary Smith, who lost her position as a wheel-nut twister at the Holden plant in Elizabeth , due to her inability to remember rightey tightey, lefty loosey. "This new law should be real good for people like me," Smith added. With the passage of this bill, Smith and millions of other untalented citizens will finally see a light at the end of the tunnel.

Said Senator, Anthony Albanese
"As a Senator with no abilities, I believe the same privileges that elected officials enjoy ought to be extended to every Australian with no abilities. It is our duty as lawmakers to provide each and every Australian citizen, regardless of his or her inadequacy, with some sort of space to take up in this great nation and a good salary for doing so."

As I know nothing of Australian politics/culture or way of life I can't really comment.

David.

[McMonster]

I think this applies to many other countries in the world, not just Australia.

[EEVblog]

Steven Conroy finally does something useful!

Dave.

[Technoguy3]

Australia needs to stop stealing our United States legislature. Our taxpayer dollars have been going to the incompetent majority for years now!

[Uncle Vernon]

Steven Conroy finally does something useful!

Dave.

Let's think of his family at this time of his passing!

[sqkybeaver]

giving someone with no ability a management job, is a really bad idea.

it sounds like many engineers are going to quit because they can't stand their tool booth bosses.

wait, that's just the status quo

[AntiProtonBoy]

The recruitment industry have been concocting wank sounding titles for shitty jobs for years, just to make them sound attractive. For example, the title "sanitation engineer" has been often reassigned to describe the role of a garbo, etc.

[Lanman]

That's hilarious!!!  Thanks for posting.  I was thinking they must be copying California legislation. 

Dave,

[vk6zgo]

It is a poorly modified version of an American original. http://www.hoax-slayer.com/no-abilities-act.html
( Rightwingers are not known for originality in their "satire").

And,it's OLD!
The sample I found was from 2006,mentioning Ted Kennedy instead of Anthony Albanese as "a Senator with no abilities".
Well.he has no abilities now,the poor bloke's dead!

There is a lot of this crap doing the rounds.
It annoys me when people sneer at others who are just trying to do their jobs to the best of their abilities.

I used to work for Telecom Australia back in the day,& even then,before the Internet,there was the same drivel going around.

If you worked for the Government,you were by definition,either incompetent,or sly & calculating like the bloke in "Yes,Minister",wore pin striped pants & sat around being fed tea by Tea ladies.
The Tea lady at the Private job was the first I ever saw.In the Government,you had to buy your own tea & milk & make your own tea!

When I went back to the Private Sector,I remarked that it wasn't any harder than Government work,& was told,"You're in the Honeymoon period,it'll kick in soon"!
Well,I was there 10 years,& it never kicked in!

Sorry for the rant,but some people are stupid enough to take this "humour" seriously.

VK6ZGO