Following up after work...
1.
A pair of math students are talking after class. "Nice bike! Where'd you get it?" "Thanks! It's the strangest story. I was going across campus the other day, when, suddenly, a woman ride up on her bicycle. She gets off, strips naked and says, 'Take whatever you like!'" "That's crazy! Well, You made a really smart choice when you took the bicycle." "Yeah, the clothes wouldn't have fit, anyway."
2.
An engineer, a mathematician, and a physicist are each placed in one side of a room. On the other side, a beautiful woman is standing. They are told that, at each time interval, they may move half of the remaining distance towards her.
The mathematician concludes that, at iteration N, there will always be a remaining distance of 1/N times the width of the room, which will never equal zero. He gives up on the spot.
The physicist complains that, if each iteration requires a finite amount of energy, then the energy expended in the approach will be inversely proportional to the distance remaining, and the full traversal will require infinite energy. he gives up on the spot.
The engineer merely says, "I'll get close enough for practical purposes".
3.
A Physicist, an engineer, and a mathematician are all locked in separate burning buildings.
The Physicist runs to a chalkboard, calculates exactly how much water he will need to put out the fire, fills a bucket just large enough, dumps it on the fire, and survives.
The engineer pulls out a calculator, calculates exactly how much water he will need to put out the fire, runs and finds ten buckets each large enough, dumps them on the fire, and survives.
The mathematician runs to a chalkboard, calculates exactly how much water he will need to put out the fire, declares "a solution exists!", and then burns to death.
4.
http://britneyspears.ac/lasers.htmDoesn't seem to be as I remembered it (primitive image memes), perhaps diluted over time and lost to the winds of change. But this site remains; enjoy.
Tim