I have a few must have's!
Given you are spice-centric, and have quite a list, the advice in #2 to stay with what you know, may be sound.
eg Mentor are fairly strong on the PCB side, but less so on SCH and even less on Spice & libraries.
Much of Spice revolves around the libraries
KiCad is improving, so it is worth tracking - they added Spice recently, and they have a good Shove router, but their Assembly Variant support is currently only possible via SCH-BOM, not PCB-side, so that means more work to get a variant-content placement file...
KiCad gate swap is not native in PCB, but is possible manually in SCH.
KiCad has a new [Update PCB from SCH] flow, that skips SCH manual netlist generate & manual import. Seems quite fast, which would assist gate-swap-via-sch.
No brick walls, but not seamless either....