Beamin, I know a ham in a similar situation to yourself, who maintains their old call sign, & seems to have had no negative repercussions whatever.
If you have been inactive for many years, time & lousy memories will have blurred people's identification of you, anyway.
If you change your call sign, I think you can have your address recorded as a simple PO Box number, so people will not make the connection.
OK, the FCC will know,but they know already!
After all, your sexual identity is your business, & you will be surprised how few people give a damn.
I am lazy, so use my call sign as my nickname on a number of sites, on some of which, I argue about politics, sport, electronics, & ham radio.
Other people do the same, some of which, I have had fairly heated arguments with, but it stays on the website.
In my country, it is illegal for an employer to discriminate against you on the basis of race, religion, political beliefs, sexual identity, what football team you follow, whether you like Tektronix or HP, or whatever, so that, if they ever did ferret out my identity, they couldn't do anything, anyway.
OK, I'm retired now, so even if they could do anything, it wouldn't affect me.
As to the SWR meter, my old one was probably no better than the Walmart one.
With 5 watts available out of your radio, you could make up a 50 ohm load out of resistors, perhaps in series parallel to give you good margin of power capability.
This will give you a calibration point at an SWR of 1.1:1.
If you make another at 75 ohms, that will give you a 1.5:1 calibration.
That will allow you to check the meter's calibration.
If you want to, you can make a number of these calibration loads by calculating what different values of R will give you.
This will allow you to draw up a correction sheet.
I Googled for SWR calculators, some don't seem to work with the iPad, so they may be dead, or maybe they just don't speak Safari.
This one worked OK:-
http://www.typnet.net/AJ4CO/Calculators/Impedance_Mismatch_Loss_and_SWR.htm