So the options that seem to present themselves are:
* to use small NPN transistors in parallel, so each one is only switching <500mA. It would mean 12 transistors for 4 strips of RGB.
* bin these silly LEDs and just buy the 12V WS2812s, even though I don't need individual (or groups of 3) addressing, they are much easier to deal with.
I might use these elsewhere and just wire 12V to all the pins (or actually 12V to one and ground to the others).