If you want LED to light up when power is OK, this circuit will not work. Because it will be light up in both conditions (just different current), because of 5k resistor to internal 5V. In fact it may be dangerous, because you are injecting some current into internal 5V, which may rise the regulated voltage. But I think this module allows some current to be injected this way.
Anyway. If you want POWER OK = LED ON, then you need to have 5V as I wrote in the last post. Either by using dc/dc converter driven from main output or at least a resistor divider. Resistor divider may not be a solid solution, but if you do not want to invest a lot into this solution, it will be fine I guess. Something like 4.7K and 1K resistor will get you near 5V point from 28V output. Calculate yourself.