It wouldn’t “suck beyond imagination”. Yes, sprays exist to make plastics ESD-safe
Thanks, but you are equally "plain wrong" saying it
wouldn't suck beyond imagination, the chances really are it either sucks or doesn't, also depending on the level of that imagination-defined suckery threshold. Neither of us really knows what happens if the OP tries it.
Do you really think most such sprays are designed to be used on working surfaces exposed to a lot of wear and tear? I could think about coating a table with such material, but then I'd use another layer of static-dissipative plastic or whatever. Mouse pads specifically use plastics that are easy to clean, i.e., the adhesion may suck, maybe do a high-voltage corona discharge treatment to it before coating? And as Nusa says, some are fabric-covered.
Maybe a carefully selected product could impregnate a wooden table like a good layer of lacquer and stay there, yes, but if you just spray "Licron Crystal ESD-Safe Coating" on a standard mousepad, I don't feel very confident it won't start flaking off after a few months of heavy use, but maybe I'm wrong. You also need to consider the chances that the OP is limited to buying something that is easily available to them at a sane cost. This would be a huge experiment with no guarantee about the result.
I have one such spray bottle (graphite-based) for adding ESD protection to those places which are
not working surfaces (which would be easily protected by half a square meter of off-the-shelf cheap ESD mat), and where some flaking or wear isn't catastrophic, like shelves, chairs, etc. ESD safe furniture, OTOH, costs ridiculous sums of money, so I very well understand why the products you linked exist.
Also note the product is just static dissipative, meaning it's not generating a charge when you rub against it. It likely isn't conductive enough to sink a charge through the material to a ground connection point unless you give it a lot of time. I have never seen such an ESD mat; ESD mats always seem to have a more conductive bottom layer (with a connection point for grounding). They are actually able to sink a charge. I
think there might be reasons why they are that way. My guess is that the importance of the ESD mat being actually conductive is paramount when the ESD procedures are lacking elsewhere, i.e., no ESD floor, shoes, furniture, etc. The mat is finally the place where you drop your component packaging, rest your hands, and being able to discharge plays a role here.