General > General Technical Chat
Genuine question- is Please and Thankyou a cultural thing on the EEVBlog forum ?
(1/9) > >>
Fraser:
I have a question that may not be truly technical but it does effect my input to this technical forum so I think it valid.

I have been a member of the this forum for many years and have offered help to other forum members, where able. I am most active in the Thermal Imaging sub forum these days. Over those years of providing help I have experienced one niggle that still bugs me.... Please and Thankyou .........

I am British and was brought up to say “Please” when I needed help and “Thankyou” when I received that help. I have lost count of the number of times that a forum member has asked a technical question, I have provided the answer, and there has been no “Thankyou” or, in some cases, the person just “Ghosted” me. Sadly this is most prevalent amongst newbies to the forum and Zero Posters contacting me via PM for help, software, manuals etc.

I am at the point now where I seriously consider not helping Zero Posters who PM me. No one likes to feel ‘used’ and I am not the human form of Google or the Wayback Machine !

My father said that in this modern world it may be that people treat those with knowledge just like Google..... that is to say..... ask a question, get the answer, and move on without further comment. If that is true, it is a very sad state of affairs and it makes the person providing the help feel less inclined to help others in the future. In my upbringing “Please” and “Thankyou” were very important words  that really mean something but I am British and things may be culturally different in other countries. I remember seeing an interview with a chap on TV where he was surprised that Brits say Please and Thankyou as in his culture such is not needed or expected. In Russia I would walk into a shop, and would be totally ignored until I said “ pozhaluysta” (Please) and it was expected that I say “ Spasibo” (Thank you) when I had been helped. You learnt those words quickly when you went shopping in Moscow.

So to the topic of this Post...... Am I being unfair and too judgemental of other forum members who do not say “Please” or, more importantly, “Thank you”. I know we should not expect payment for helping others but common courtesy seems a fair response when someone helps you. I often spend much time helping a person and it does hurt/annoy when they just Ghost you without even a Thank you for your efforts  :(

If it is indeed a cultural thing, then fair enough, at least I will know that fact and not feel so used and abused  :-+

To offset this possibly negative post, I can report that I have been thanked many times for the help that I have provided and, in some cases, companies have even sent me Amazon vouchers ! Not expected or requested, but such a nice surprise when it happens as you know the person valued your help enough to send a gift  :-+

Fraser



Neganur:
Saying thanks isn’t payment, it’s just basic politeness.
I too am experiencing it. Get badgered for some technical detail and once you answer it there is nothing but silence.

Getting a ‘hey it worked, cheers!’  Would certainly be nice.
jpanhalt:
Let me add that just saying "Thank you" is sufficient for me.  I do not particularly like the idea of keeping score with a "Like/Thank you" button, but agree that using such buttons can potentially reduce clutter.  Perhaps, keep the buttons, but don't keep the score?

The downside of keeping score is that one sees competition for "likes."  That seems to lead to silliness and worse.
iainwhite:

--- Quote from: Fraser on March 20, 2021, 01:59:08 pm ---So to the topic of this Post...... Am I being unfair and too judgemental of other forum members who do not say “Please” or, more importantly, “Thank you”.

--- End quote ---

I do not think you are being unreasonable at all.
I think basic politeness is fundamental to any discussion.

I would add that it is nice to see a question posed on a forum where it is clear that the poster has done a little basic research before asking the question.
Many questions I see posted on the forum could be answered by pasting the question into a Google search. 
JohnnyMalaria:
I'm afraid it's a sign of the times and rampant elsewhere. I hang out in ResearchGate to provide advice in my area of expertise. A similar question came up: https://www.researchgate.net/post/People_asking_questions_here_on_researchgate_often_do_not_feed_back_to_answers_at_all2

My reply:


--- Quote ---I don't answer questions to get patted on the back. I do it to help and don't expect anything in return.
If you answer with an expectation of gratitude, your are likely to be disappointed. If you don't have the expectation, your life will carry on...
Now, a few years ago, I had a very different attitude. It seemed to change with my hair color.
--- End quote ---

To which someone replied (and I'd agree with):


--- Quote ---I agree with you in the two points:
a) getting patted back as a baby child is not my expectation; in the meantime my hair are as white as yours.
b) there is no expectation of gratitude on may side.
But I demand some some kind of feed back at all (even a general feed back adressing all answers showing up) in order to see whether my or any other answers, which often bear lot of informations, will guide the questioner on the right track on solving his isssue. This feed back can be either 'positive' (yes) or 'negative' (no) or neutral. In the case of 'positiv', there is no necessity of a further action. In case of 'negative', additional alternatives can be developed in oder to help further on.
There is no demand on a 'thank you' from my side. There is a demand on any kind of feed back.
Often the questioner 'only' responses by a recommendation. That means for me; the answer is seen, is ok and is acknowledged. That feed back is ok.
Often the questioner 'only' pops up as new follower. That means for me: he has seen the question, but he is too shy to answer. That feed back is ok. But unfortunately I do not know how whether there is a need of further help. Further actions, if desired, are up to the questioner.
But we all here are (should be) well educated persons of sufficient age and 'no reaction' at all is not an appropriate style of communication...
--- End quote ---

If I'm the questioner, I make sure I give thanks/feedback.

Navigation
Message Index
Next page
There was an error while thanking
Thanking...

Go to full version
Powered by SMFPacks Advanced Attachments Uploader Mod