Author Topic: engineering jokes  (Read 16774 times)

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Online bd139

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #100 on: July 29, 2019, 07:17:03 pm »
Ahh yes the backlog. A magic carpet which all accepted risks are put under.

 

Offline coppercone2

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #101 on: August 03, 2019, 09:07:11 pm »
i will not comment because someone might actually implement what I say :-[

at some point its like selling high quality 'scream' masks next to a sorority house from a hot dog stand at 2am, its obviously a joke but i am pretty sure some nut would come along and pilfer a project with it
« Last Edit: August 03, 2019, 09:09:23 pm by coppercone2 »
 

Offline nigelwright7557

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #102 on: August 06, 2019, 10:01:28 am »
She was only the electronic engineers daughter but no one could resistor.
PCBCAD51 PCB design software https://www.murtonpikesystems.co.uk
 

Offline tocsa120ls

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #103 on: August 28, 2019, 12:47:10 pm »
On a recent video recommendation by youtube...

Q: How many amp techs does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Just one -- he begins at the front door and replaces every bulb in the building until he gets the one that is out.
-------
Short circuit - long fire
 

Offline BU508A

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #104 on: August 28, 2019, 04:34:17 pm »
Q: "What goal do you have?"

A: "Knocking-off time."

Q: "And on the long run?"

A: "Weekend."
“Chaos is found in greatest abundance wherever order is being sought. It always defeats order, because it is better organized.”            - Terry Pratchett -
 

Offline macboy

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #105 on: August 30, 2019, 04:24:04 pm »
Three engineers from America, Germany, and Japan are playing golf. They hear ringing. The Japanese engineer says "excuse me, I'm getting a call", extends his little finger and thumb, holding his hand to his face, and proceeds to carry on a conversation. He finishes, and explains that he was using his company's latest prototype, a phone built in to his hand. The others were impressed. Later, they hear ringing again. the German says "excuse me, I'm getting a call", taps the side of his head, and has a short conversation. When done, he explained he was using the latest in German technology: a phone built in to his head. The others were impressed. Later, the American says "excuse me...", walks to the bushes, drops his pants, squats, and explains, "I'm getting a fax!".
 
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Offline coppercone2

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #106 on: August 31, 2019, 03:34:39 am »
this is what you look like when you see test equipment

 
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Offline ChunkyPastaSauce

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #107 on: August 31, 2019, 04:13:06 am »
 

Offline bsfeechannel

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #108 on: September 05, 2019, 03:28:51 am »
 

Offline BU508A

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #109 on: October 10, 2019, 08:53:52 am »
A police officer stops a car. Behind the steering wheel sits Heisenberg.
Officer: "Sir, do you know how fast you were driving?"
Heisenberg: "No, but I do know exactly where I am."

 :)
“Chaos is found in greatest abundance wherever order is being sought. It always defeats order, because it is better organized.”            - Terry Pratchett -
 

Offline BU508A

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #110 on: October 10, 2019, 06:30:18 pm »
Erwin Schrödinger is seeing the veterinary surgeon.
Says the vet: "Regarding your cat: I have good news and bad news ..."

 :)
“Chaos is found in greatest abundance wherever order is being sought. It always defeats order, because it is better organized.”            - Terry Pratchett -
 

Offline Sal Ammoniac

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #111 on: October 10, 2019, 06:47:15 pm »
String Theory
 
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Online SiliconWizard

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #112 on: October 10, 2019, 07:07:38 pm »
 

Online rhodges

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #113 on: October 10, 2019, 09:05:32 pm »
I just saw this one in Jack Ganssle's newsletter.

Quote
From Tom Razov:

A QA engineer walks into a bar. Orders a beer. Orders 0 beers. Orders 99999999999 beers. Orders a lizard. Orders -1 beers. Orders a ueicbksjdhd. First real customer walks in and asks where the bathroom is. The bar bursts into flames, killing everyone.
Currently developing STM8. Past includes 6809, Z80, 8086, PIC, MIPS, PNX1302, and some 8748 and 6805.
 
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Online fourfathom

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Re: engineering jokes
« Reply #114 on: October 10, 2019, 10:59:25 pm »
If architects designed buildings like software engineers designed programs, than the first woodpecker that came along would destroy all civilization.
 


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