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| How to deal with manipulative coworker |
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| Psi:
--- Quote from: nctnico on September 24, 2022, 02:29:20 pm ---The latter is precisely the problem in the case of the OP: it is very easy to be perceived as somebody who is just complaining about what -in the end- is a personal problem. --- End quote --- Yep, that's why I said that he resign at the same time. It mostly eliminates those suspicions about false complaints because he'd be leaving anyway. He wouldn't have anything to gain by sending the letter other than giving the CEO a heads-up about the problem. It very much depends on the company, some CEOs are hands on and always happy to hear about how the company can improve, some hide away and want nothing to do with you. |
| virtualparticles:
This is awful. I've been through it a few times though and I feel your pain. Best of luck sir. |
| Kasper:
--- Quote from: tszaboo on September 08, 2022, 11:24:32 am ---I had my immediate report and the CEO talking to me. "We would like to keep you, but..." [...] Deep down, I was aware that it's a toxic management company. I kinda got used to it over the years. I had 6 manager in the past 5 years, they were coming and going. Each one with different requirements on Project management tools, one wanted constant booking of hours, the other was the CEO himself, who was managing us without being in the office for a full day in a week, and not responding to emails. --- End quote --- Bad coworkers come and go. They become a problem when the boss lets them. In which case, the boss is a bigger problem and that is difficult to fix. Sounds like your ceo is the problem. Lots of turnover in a small company and siding with someone who has been there 1/5 as long as you is not a good sign. Some prospective employeers look at how long you typically stay at jobs and ask why you left. I think prospective employees should be asking how many staff are employeed on average, how many leave each year and why they left. The 2 worst places I worked had high turnover. Vastly higher than other places I worked. At both of them, I regretted not leaving as quickly as my coworkers. I'm actually still at one of them. The ceo was recently let go and things seem to be improving but I still think I'd have been better off leaving long ago. I think 5 years is plenty and I don't think potential employeers will scrutinize the reason you left. If you feel the need to explain, I wouldn't get into the drama and specifics, just mentioning how high their management turnover was should suffice. That could backfire though, if they suspect you were the cause of the high turnover. Complimenting the ones that left could help eas those suspicions. Perhaps one of them could be a reference for you instead of one of the toxic ones that are still there. It may be frustrating to let this bad coworker cause a change of employement but hopefully in the long run, their impact on your life will be positive. Maybe they will motivate you to leave that toxic company and find a better one. |
| fourfathom:
--- Quote from: Psi on September 27, 2022, 07:11:42 am ---Yep, that's why I said that he resign at the same time. It mostly eliminates those suspicions about false complaints because he'd be leaving anyway. He wouldn't have anything to gain by sending the letter other than giving the CEO a heads-up about the problem. --- End quote --- (I bolded the important part). He might have something to lose though. A letter to the CEO will likely do no good whatsoever, and may still damage his career should a prospective employer contact the previous employer for a reference. Sending a letter to the CEO just looks bad, and you owe them nothing. If the previous company management wants feedback they will ask for it during an exit interview. |
| nctnico:
--- Quote from: fourfathom on September 28, 2022, 08:10:33 am --- --- Quote from: Psi on September 27, 2022, 07:11:42 am ---Yep, that's why I said that he resign at the same time. It mostly eliminates those suspicions about false complaints because he'd be leaving anyway. He wouldn't have anything to gain by sending the letter other than giving the CEO a heads-up about the problem. --- End quote --- (I bolded the important part). He might have something to lose though. A letter to the CEO will likely do no good whatsoever, and may still damage his career should a prospective employer contact the previous employer for a reference. Sending a letter to the CEO just looks bad, and you owe them nothing. If the previous company management wants feedback they will ask for it during an exit interview. --- End quote --- Exactly! Remember it is a small world out there; 6 degrees of seperation ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Six_degrees_of_separation)! It happens to me regulary that when I talk to a customer that they know several people I have worked with in the past. So burning one bridge leads to a raging forrest fire quickly. Even when asked for feedback, bite your tongue hard and stay positive. |
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