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How to deal with manipulative coworker

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nvmR:
OP, we're cheering for you, be strong! Find something new that interests you, and leave. You'll be shocked after a while that it took you so long to leave.
Make sure to leave as cleanly as possible and legally. I overdo it, and feel that 100% of work that occurred at the company is the companies IP, so I have no ownership of it.

I video that really helped me understand what was to come when leaving was this one:


Good Luck!

nctnico:
As a side note: My saying is that companies as an entity have the moral compass of a 4 year old child.

tggzzz:

--- Quote from: nctnico on September 21, 2022, 09:11:21 pm ---As a side note: My saying is that companies as an entity have the moral compass of a 4 year old child.

--- End quote ---

Not always true.

When I worked for HP, and before Princess Fiorina, there was a very strong moral compass inside HP. It was known as "The HP Way".

The way the HP Way" was propagated was interesting. It was partly written down, but new people - and more importantly new sites - became familiar with via osmositic absorbtion of numerous "Bill and Dave" stories which illustrated simple practical applications of the morals[1].

Princess Carly explicitly declared The HP Way dead, replacing it with the incomprehensible and unusable "Rules of the Garage".

No idea what the current culture is; I left HP two decades ago.

[1] One examples story: in the 70s a new HP minicomputer was "disappointing" customers. When this got to Dave's attention, he wrote a memo to the project manager, Paul Ely, saying simply "please ensure that when we release products they conform to the advertised performance". That, in HP terms, was a stingin rebuke. Ely's response was to frame the memo, and hang it on his office wall. Ely went on to have a good career within HP.

Nominal Animal:

--- Quote from: pcprogrammer on September 21, 2022, 11:37:11 am ---
--- Quote from: Fraser on September 21, 2022, 11:06:59 am ---Nominal Animal…you and I have much in common !

--- End quote ---
As do I and probably others on the forum too. Caring for the work and trying to do it perfect will bring you down in the end. Been there twice. The first time full on breakdown, the second time almost and I walked away from it. After that I tried to keep ahead of it, but it was not easy. It is housed in my DNA :palm:

--- End quote ---
That's exactly the reason I'm voicing it out: people like us, including tszaboo, technically oriented people motivated by the work itself, are particularly susceptible to this; and this can easily destroy us.  I'm just waving a flag, saying "here lies a dangerous pitfall, beware", and describing what happened to myself to show that the pitfall has sharp spikes in it, illustrating how serious a danger it is.


--- Quote from: tggzzz on September 21, 2022, 09:23:06 pm ---
--- Quote from: nctnico on September 21, 2022, 09:11:21 pm ---As a side note: My saying is that companies as an entity have the moral compass of a 4 year old child.

--- End quote ---
Not always true.

When I worked for HP, and before Princess Fiorina, there was a very strong moral compass inside HP. It was known as "The HP Way".
--- End quote ---
It depends on the owners and stockholders, actually.  The purpose of a company is to make profit, and if the leadership puts anything before profit, stockholders may take them into court.  However, if the owners/stockholders tell the company to behave in a specific way, then the situation is different.

Thing is, how many Owners are there that put things like company morals ahead of their own profit?  Not many.  Some, yes; but not many.

fourfathom:
Making a profit is not evil -- that's how we put food on the table.  And there is no good reason that a company has to behave in an evil manner in order to make a profit.  But sometimes they do, by pursuing short-term gain while ignoring long-term damage, or by allowing personal biases to destroy the work environment.  It's tough to run a company, and sometimes unpleasant decisions have to be made.  And you have to make choices based on uncertain factors, steering into a future that is unknowable.  And sometimes people are just stupid.

I guess I am saying that guessing at motivations is sort of useless.  Look at the facts of your situation and act on those facts.  How or why are not important.  You can control what you do, how you react.  Take charge of your life.  Don't be a victim.

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