Recently I quit my university (EE) in Israel after finishing 2 years of materials that took me longer than that because I struggled with it.
Ok so are you more practical oriented or more theoretical?
What does your (dream) job look like ?
Is there some form of BSc education in your country with more practical classes (some fat in the meat to make you more enthousiastic than books alone ? )
My personal history: I did MBA at university for three years and quit halfway the 3rd year because I realized I hated most of the classes, it was superficial bullshit and I like to know more about electronics than organisational theory.
Changed to BSc EE and loved it all A's , then could not find work in EE so changed to embedded software, still close to the hardware and I like that very much.
A few years back my company wanted me to learn web stuff and all that was to far from hardware for me to stay interested so dropped that as well.
You have to find what you would like to do, best way is to join linkedin and start to link to persons close to your livingplace having a job you might like and start a coffee talk with them. Show them you are in doubt of which course and would like to know what their job looks like.
So start from the job you like, then see what education best fits that job.
Since I know some programming both from my high school and university and I fairly find it interesting to some degree, and after thinking of many options I'm thinking to take a university program in web development for 1 year, it's going to be mostly practical and job oriented with many projects so I can bare it.
This sounds like you are not really wanting it. Don't do it then. IMPE you should do what gives you energy to study and energy to do.
If you already think it is a struggle why do it ?
I will also learn some languages like Java and Python online on my own and work on some projects and by a year from now I could start working in this field, I need to have a reliable job at this point I'm 28 and married.
Ouch that changes things, if you are an earner you should look at evening studies. This is really hard, I had to do the last two years of my EE besides a day job, did not have a partner then so I put in 12 hours a weekday, 9 for work and 3 for study, in the weekends another 6 hours a day.
The good thing also is that software related jobs are open for people without a degree and it's more skill based than jobs in electrical engineering.
There are a lot of jobs yes, but you still have to pull your weight. Experience counts.
and getting away from electronics where my heart is, I'm fearful of that.
Why? You can always have it as a hobby. Change is often considered scary. After my EE I was pretty devistated that I had a SW role, but as long as it is close to hardware it was pretty fun. My knowledge of EE and hobby experience even made me more valuable than my other SW colleagues to the companies. I still practice it as a hobby which is also fun, without the pain of a boss or marketing guy demanding the impossible.
I considered that even having enough time for electronics as a hobby at home would be hard with a demanding Job in software
Nonsense argument, I proof you wrong. It is the wife that will take up the most free time next to your job
How to manage that you have to find out on your own, each one comes with(out) a different manual.
and it would be harder to take my hobby in electronics to a more professional level without working in the industry.
That sounds like you would like to start your own business, which is again an entirely different path. What is it that you really want to do, and be reasonable , a superhero, billionaire business owner is not an answer.
What should I do ?
IMO at least get a BSc degree, perhaps besides a day or parttime job to help support your wife. Why a degree, because it helps getting hired and pays more in the long run than without a degree. The only reason a degree won't help is if you want to start your own business but from your words I don't hear an entrepreneur