Internet dating

[GK]

This hottie who fancies me just requested a personal live chat with me on a well known internet dating site!
She looks amazingly youthful for a 37 year old, me thinks.



Here is a cut and paste of our chat:


----------- June 15, 2015, 6:07 PM -----------


"hello" "are you still there?"

Me: "Hi, yes, I only just noticed this now!"

"oh okay my dear friend " "how are you doing today?" "oh okay how are you doing today?"

Me: "I am fine, how are you?"

 "I am doing good " "nice to meet you here" "i am a new member on this dating site "

Me: "It's nice to meet you; I just joined up yesterday"

 "the same to me here " "but i am here for only one man who is interested for us to build good relationship for the rest of our life " "hello" "hello"

 "Sorry"

 "hi"

Me: "I'm doing a few things here at the moment, including preparing dinner"

"oh okay my dear friend " "okay then i am willing for us to know each other well if you have a personal email address okay "

Me: "Hmmm..... you can email me through the website. BTW, is that really you in the profile photo?"

 "no my dear i dont know much " "that is why i am asking for a personal email address okay "

Me: "Hi. On my profile page, below the photo, you just have to click on the "Email Him" button."

 "my dear i will not always be here so if you are interested let us know each other on our personal messenger okay " "this is my email address is **removed**" "and you?"

Me: "OK, I'll think about it. I'm sorry but I have to leave as my pasta is boiling. BTW, is that really you in the profile picture?"

 "yes but we cannot build a relationship here okay " "that is why i am asking for your personal email address"

Me: "Why can't we build a relationship here?"

 "here is a dating site and also i am here for only one man " "many people are willing for us to talk but not interested dear"

Me: "That neither makes sense nor answers the question"

"no if you really want us to know each other then you can send me email okay"

Me: "Hmm OK, bye"


LOL, I think I'm in love.

Beware of scammers - though this is the stupidest and most incompetent that I have encountered so far.

 

[Halcyon]

Maybe you need a copy of Dave's book 'The Art of Internet Dating'. Available on Amazon or through Dave's website: http://artofinternetdating.com/author.htm

I'm sure Dave would be kind enough to autograph it for you :-)

[Deathwish]

hahahaha I looked at that page, look at Mr Cool in his shades. John Travolta eat ya heart out. I wonder if he sings staying alive whilst playing with high voltages as well.

[george graves]

Maybe you need a copy of Dave's book 'The Art of Internet Dating'. Available on Amazon or through Dave's website: http://artofinternetdating.com/author.htm

I so want to read this, just for the chuckles.

[GK]

I think I'll pass on the book -  though I guess that since the forum host has written such a thing this isn't too far off topic 

Funny, less than 20 minutes after that chat I got a wink from a brand new member who was also drop-dead gorgeous. Her profile was replete with pseudo philosophical/non-nonsensical drivel written in barely decipherable English. I did a Google image search of her and it turns out she (the woman pictured) is a Brazilian model/wife of some soccer player and the exact same photo featuring in the profile is all over the net. I've reported both. It's an absolute joke because profile pictures and written text aren't visible to the public until approved by a person/site admin., and this stuff is flagrantly fraudulent. I've also been bothered on this site by women living in China that look like super models!

The dating site is Match.com - I suggest to be avoided like the plague. I've deleted my profile and have requested a refund in writing for my 3 months subscription, though I might be out of 80 bucks in the end.

 

[sleemanj]

The dating site is Match.com - I suggest to be avoided like the plague. I've deleted my profile and have requested a refund in writing for my 3 months subscription, though I might be out of 80 bucks in the end.

Since this is EEVBlog, you should have a look at OKCupid.com  - while it is owned by Match.com these days, it has a basis in a somewhat scientific (mathematical, Myers-Briggs etc...) approach - not in a religious-plenty-of-fish way.

Once upon a time they used to produce some really interesting blog posts about statistical stuff gleaned from their database....then Match bought them and started a transformation into their usual photo-gallery pick-the-pretty-lady deal.  But they didn't go full out so there is still some of the original concept of OKC left.

Once upon a time I was tasked to write an online match making site and had to do some research on the various players, the site I wrote of course went nowhere and folded within a year, usual story, customer had a "build it and they will come get on the gravy train" mentality.  Sigh.

Now, where did I put my robe and wizard hat.

[Stonent]

I met 3 girls on match. Dated one for 9 months another for a month and had one date with one. Got 3 hits on okcupid. One was a one dater. Another was 6 months. And the last one I married.

Plentyoffish.com got me lots of hits with girls willing to go on a date but they always came up when I was dating someone else. So they ended up being just chatting.

I tended to spend about a month chatting with them before going on a date. Moreso to make them more comfortable with the potential serial killer on the other side

[GK]

I currently have a paid subscription to the pretentiously named "Elite Singles". That site is very tightly controlled and your profile is only made available/visible to other members strictly matching your selected criteria (ie not women that remarkably all look like super models with professionally taken glamor-type portrait profile photos from either interstate, China or Russia). It would take a particularly dedicated scammer intent on communicating only through your personal email address to get him/her/itself into there.

That site is the least awful of all I've checked out so far. It also claims to be one of the more "scientific" sites and the sign-up process includes a million questions from which a "personality profile" is eventually generated. I have my doubts though about how these results are applied in practice because the personality profiles of my supplied matches pretty much vary all over the place. E-Harmony appear to be based on the exact same engine as when you sign-up you are asked the exact same questions for personality profiling. The actual site format of E-harmony though is beyond awful and I deleted my (as of then unpaid) account nearly as soon as I had completed it. The site appears to be optimized for tablet viewing and ones ability to express oneself intelligently in the written word is even more restricted.

I honestly thought that the pinnacle of spaghetti-brained web developers were those responsible for producing on-line electronic components stores. Then I decided to give internet dating a go.
 
 

[amyk]

If you doubt whether someone actually exists, it's quite simple to confirm: just ask them to show a picture of something that they probably don't have already - like putting your name and the date on a piece of paper.

[steve30]

Some fake profiles are blindingly obvious. As for people who can't spell or type etc, I just tend to ignore. After all, I can't make sense of what they say anyway .

Don't think I've ever really dealt with these fake profiles much myself. I am on dating sites for 'alternative sexualities' though, and that probably isn't a big enough market for most scammers.

[dfmischler]

Shouldn't the site managers be ensuring that everybody can pass a Turing test?  In English?

[GK]

I pains me to say this, but there are so many genuine women on the internet dating scene that are so f$#@ing stupid and inarticulate it can be difficult to tell straight away if you're up against a poser or not. If someone incompatible expresses their interest in an email I do endeavor to somehow reject them with compliments rather than just rudely ignoring. Sometimes it might be an ethnic chick, and you're left wondering if English may be her second language; it could be construed as rude to ask if it turns out that it isn't! Dead giveaways of a potential fraud are pleading to communicate via personal email only on the first contact or a woman from an address 3000km away stating that she is willing to travel anywhere for love.
 

[TerraHertz]

One side benefit of signing up with any international dating site (eg chnlove.com) is that the targeted advertising you receive on unrelated sites suddenly has a lot of very pretty women. It's a big improvement over the usual crap.

Something to bear in mind is that only a very small percentage of people (M or F) can actually write coherently and expressively. Add in 2nd language problems (or worse, using machine translate or paid interpreters) and figuring out what people are really like is a somewhat doomed process.

[Asmyldof]

I still have an OkC profile, though the whole enterprise was doomed for me** before Match bought it.
Now that it has become theirs I have resigned to not dating until such time I have the time and resources to move to a better city for it, because even though I generally get slightly nervous about it, I work better live.

It was instantly obvious that Match bought it though, within days the option to search "including people without a picture" disappeared. Pointless idiots. Plus, of course, the general.... eh... how does one say it politely... level of linguistic coherence?? dropped to the gutter...


((**: I'm a professional over-thinker, both literally and figuratively, so I don't really manage to come off as... well adjusted on-line to people not inclined to technical side-avenue thought processes. I need a room to be able to play to the audience, basically. Most of my non-tech friends appreciate me greatly, but that's quite pointless if the F variants are in committed relationships  ))

[John Coloccia]

This hottie who fancies me just requested a personal live chat with me on a well known internet dating site!
She looks amazingly youthful for a 37 year old, me thinks.



Here is a cut and paste of our chat:


----------- June 15, 2015, 6:07 PM -----------


"hello" "are you still there?"

Me: "Hi, yes, I only just noticed this now!"

"oh okay my dear friend " "how are you doing today?" "oh okay how are you doing today?"

Me: "I am fine, how are you?"

 "I am doing good " "nice to meet you here" "i am a new member on this dating site "

Me: "It's nice to meet you; I just joined up yesterday"

 "the same to me here " "but i am here for only one man who is interested for us to build good relationship for the rest of our life " "hello" "hello"

 "Sorry"

 "hi"

Me: "I'm doing a few things here at the moment, including preparing dinner"

"oh okay my dear friend " "okay then i am willing for us to know each other well if you have a personal email address okay "

Me: "Hmmm..... you can email me through the website. BTW, is that really you in the profile photo?"

 "no my dear i dont know much " "that is why i am asking for a personal email address okay "

Me: "Hi. On my profile page, below the photo, you just have to click on the "Email Him" button."

 "my dear i will not always be here so if you are interested let us know each other on our personal messenger okay " "this is my email address is **removed**" "and you?"

Me: "OK, I'll think about it. I'm sorry but I have to leave as my pasta is boiling. BTW, is that really you in the profile picture?"

 "yes but we cannot build a relationship here okay " "that is why i am asking for your personal email address"

Me: "Why can't we build a relationship here?"

 "here is a dating site and also i am here for only one man " "many people are willing for us to talk but not interested dear"

Me: "That neither makes sense nor answers the question"

"no if you really want us to know each other then you can send me email okay"

Me: "Hmm OK, bye"


LOL, I think I'm in love.

Beware of scammers - though this is the stupidest and most incompetent that I have encountered so far.

Careful, or you'll get roped into helping her uncle.  He's was an army general, but is now in fear for his life after the coup.  He'll be fine if he can only find someone to help him get his millions out of Uhzturkistan.

[zapta]

This forum is a great matching place for single women. Just pretend that you care about electronics (an Arduino will do), join this forum and start shooting single guys in the barrel.

Dave, this is a business opportunity for you, especially that you are already an expert in internet dating and DateAnEE.com is still free.

[Richard Crowley]

Maybe this is a uni experiment trying to make a modern, "dating" version of a Turing Test.   

[Asmyldof]

This forum is a great matching place for single women. Just pretend that you care about electronics (an Arduino will do), join this forum and start shooting single guys in the barrel.

Dave, this is a business opportunity for you, especially that you are already an expert in internet dating and DateAnEE.com is still free.

 

[Deathwish]

I think maybe some of us have watched weird science once too often .. 

[German_EE]

As somebody who tried Internet Dating for some time (and had amazing fun) I have a few words of advice for you:

1) Beautiful drop dead gorgeous women do not post on Internet Dating sites. Use Tin Eye (www.tineye.com) and see if the image has been used elsewhere.

2) If the profile or a message includes the words 'God fearing' or, even worse, 'god fearing' then walk away.

3) If they suddenly change location to somewhere in Eastern Europe or West Africa then walk away.

4) Another red flag phrase, 'I have no child' rather than 'I have no children'

5) NEVER send them any money, if you receive a request for money then report them to the site administrators.

6) Finally, when meeting for the first time (especially if you have to fly to a foreign country) then take great care. In my case the two guys at the airport holding the sign with my name on it looked nothing like the woman I was there to meet and I reported straight to the nearest policemen.

[Deathwish]

As somebody who tried Internet Dating for some time (and had amazing fun) I have a few words of advice for you:
 Use Tin Eye (www.tineye.com) and see if the image has been used elsewhere.

Omg, I checked my profile pic, it says I am not human and I have been used a number of times  . Very unhappy now.

[steve30]

As somebody who tried Internet Dating for some time (and had amazing fun) I have a few words of advice for you:

<snip>

6) Finally, when meeting for the first time (especially if you have to fly to a foreign country) then take great care. In my case the two guys at the airport holding the sign with my name on it looked nothing like the woman I was there to meet and I reported straight to the nearest policemen.

Just out of curiosity, why would you fly to a different country to meet someone? Not saying you shouldn't, but I just thought it sounded a bit much for someone you've not met before.

On a side note, I've just been looking through some personals listings on Craigslist, and there were several posts saying 'ignore such and such a person.. he'll rob you at knife point'. Creepy.

[Deathwish]

In a lot of cases it is because of abject loneliness steve, the world we are living in as far as I can see is getting more and more insular, people no longer have the time to go out , or fear doing so, people are becoming more and more scared of the opposite sex male or female abusing them or screaming false accusations at them. I suppose once you get to a certain age and are no longer prime material for dating and income and you end up on the scrap pile of life your choices are limited, at such point the users in life will make the most of you by playing you online for cash or a home in a country that is much better than theirs. i was told that a lot of the Russian women are used by the Russian Mafia on those sites, how true i do not know.

[KJDS]

When I was young and energetic I went through a phase of trying to have my way with every woman in England who was into internet dating. Whilst I didn't have any more success with that than trying to rid the world of beer one pint at a time, I did give it my best shot and had a lot of fun too.

Do:
Arrange to meet once the banter gets fun.
Be prepared to spend a lot of time travelling, waiting for them to turn up, to be 10kgs heavier than their photo, (the worst was over 50kg heavier than advertised) and that the phrase "athletic build" usually refers to that era when East German shot putters would consume more steroids than is healthy.
Make sure you have fun, and escape route, if it's a long way away that you have a back-up plan and always always bag up.

Don't:
Avoid banter, or delay meeting.
Take it too seriously

[Deathwish]

KJDS , that analogy or shot putters reminds me, i need to watch jumping Jack flash again....  , but yes, I have been there once or twice, sadly they were some of the nicest girls I ever spoke to, but just too needy for me .