Just lost a family member to Covid19

[Stray Electron]

   The wife of one of my in-laws just passed away this afternoon from covid19.  She was 70 years old and only became ill last Friday.  She had been keeping her 14 YO grand daughter while her mother worked and they think that she caught if from her even though she was asymptomatic.

[SilverSolder]

   The wife of one of my in-laws just passed away this afternoon from covid19.  She was 70 years old and only became ill last Friday.  She had been keeping her 14 YO grand daughter while her mother worked and they think that she caught if from her even though she was asymptomatic.

Condolences. 

[Ice-Tea]

Condolences.

We kept our children from their grandparents as soon as shit hit the fan and we strongarmed my sister-in-law to do the same. Now my sister-in-law, her kid and her husband all got it (probably came in from the daycare centre). Staying away from the grandparents may have saved their life.

[2N3055]

I'm very sorry to hear that. My condolences.

[nctnico]

My condolences!

I have the awfull feeling this thread is going to be long. 

[Zero999]

Sorry for your loss.

Unfortunately, I knew this would happen to someone here at some stage. I hope everyone here is okay.

[not1xor1]

My condolences.
Unfortunately we are still at the beginning.

[Nuno_pt]

My condolences.

Here has soon has it start to hit Italy serious, we start to take precautions, like closing schools/day care centers, separating young from old people, forbid visitors in hospitals and retirement homes, we're at state of emergency for the next 15 days, that will make 1 month, many people here still belive that they can go out as they please, for taking walks on the beach, park etc, the police is making there best at trying to keep people at home, there is a un-explicit  rule that you must have an authorization to leave home for work, but since this is NOT mandatory, all the people have one, they are thinking at making mandatory for 1st need services like: medical people, fire department, garbage people, etc.

We've has of today midnight of 06/04:

Confirm - 12.442
Recover - 184
Deads - 345 (mostly over 60 years old, and the max. is over 80=> years old)
Suspects - 99.730

Here are today report - https://covid19.min-saude.pt/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/36_DGS_boletim_20200407_2.pdf

[GreyWoolfe]

My condolences.  Very sad to hear of any death.

[Stray Electron]

Staying away from the grandparents may have saved their life.

   That's worth repeating.  Too many people around here use their parents as no-cost baby sitters. Most of them don't seem to know, or care, that that could easily costs their parents their lives in this situation.

[Cerebus]

My condolences too.

I often jokingly say that you should thoroughly boil all children before petting them, but there's a slim thread of truth to it. Kids, via schools and their friends, are often the vectors for the "bug that's going around" to do that going around. That's bad enough at normal times but add to that kids are innately less good at discipline about handwashing, and following other infection avoidance advice, then the little darlings are a double threat to the vulnerable at the moment. If, as Stray Electron has said, you're in the habit of getting the little darlings out of your hair by dumping them on granny/grandad perhaps it's a good idea to consider not doing that at the moment.

[rsjsouza]

My condolences for your loss.

I am on the edge as two 70+ year-old relatives are hospitalized with Covid-19 and we are in touch twice daily, monitoring the progress of the disease. We live 8000km away in separate countries, thus there is not anything we can really do.

[Electro Detective]

Sincere Condolences for the lady's passing and the partner's loss.


Many relatives, neighbors and friends here in their 80s and 90s are in perfect vintage health so far,

and the ones with serious long term issues, preferring to cash out ASAP before their memory and vital body parts go south badly and slowly,
as well as not wanting to be a further burden on families and the health system,
are wondering why this 'latest Corona thing' has let them down

FWIW and YMMV once you pass beyond 65 and have health issues, any exposure to extreme weather, injuries, depression/anxiety, infections, bad medication mix and heavy flu or bronchial issues,
can and will finish you off once and for all. And let's not forget those tiled kitchen slips and gardening/gutter cleaning ladder falls, to get the show on the road 

Sometimes elderly people with no issues, just keel over and pass on,
whilst others in the same age and build group that are always at the doctors getting a fix, just keep going,
till their day comes to go too
and VISE VERSA applies too

Corona is getting too much credit as compared with the other 'confirmed effect' modern maladies that have been contributing to speeding up aging peoples demise for decades 

More proof required to totally buy into this global panic flogging, not pages of statistics from questionable and conflicting sources,
backed by circus news media industry 'story' vendors, doing what they regularly do best..roll with anything that gets them attention and advertisers   

[basinstreetdesign]

Condolences!
 

[Zero999]

My condolences too.

I often jokingly say that you should thoroughly boil all children before petting them, but there's a slim thread of truth to it. Kids, via schools and their friends, are often the vectors for the "bug that's going around" to do that going around. That's bad enough at normal times but add to that kids are innately less good at discipline about handwashing, and following other infection avoidance advice, then the little darlings are a double threat to the vulnerable at the moment. If, as Stray Electron has said, you're in the habit of getting the little darlings out of your hair by dumping them on granny/grandad perhaps it's a good idea to consider not doing that at the moment.

Yes that's true. I'm quite concerned about my 5 year old nephew picking his nose and eating it. I hope my sister manages to nip it in the bud soon.

[jogri]

My condolences.

Yes that's true. I'm quite concerned about my 5 year old nephew picking his nose and eating it. I hope my sister manages to nip it in the bud soon.

From a virological standpoint that really doesn't matter as you also have a mucous membrane inside your nose and the acid in the stomach will probably kill the virus anyway...

[Stray Electron]

My condolences.

Yes that's true. I'm quite concerned about my 5 year old nephew picking his nose and eating it. I hope my sister manages to nip it in the bud soon.

From a virological standpoint that really doesn't matter as you also have a mucous membrane inside your nose and the acid in the stomach will probably kill the virus anyway...

   I was thinking the same. Disgusting, but better that he eats it instead of leaving it laying around to possibly infect others.

   Children really are filthy little animals. I know, I was one once.  But this time around, the BIG problem is that they usually don't get sick or even show any sign of being infected so they readily spread the virus, but the virus is deadly to the over 60 YO age group.

[Cerebus]

But this time around, the BIG problem is that they usually don't get sick or even show any sign of being infected so they readily spread the virus, but the virus is deadly to the over 60 YO age group.

It's a problem in general. Anyone who's had to deal with illness in children will tell you that the robust health of youth means that they can mask the symptoms for a long time and then go downhill rapidly. You or I might think "I'm a bit off today" or "I think I'm getting ready to come down with something" a day or two before we get properly ill; a 2 year old is far too busy charging around and destroying your house to notice that they feel "a bit off". Sure, the level of mayhem and destruction might be at a slightly lower level, but you take that as a blesséd relief, not the sign of impending illness.

[Zero999]

My condolences.

Yes that's true. I'm quite concerned about my 5 year old nephew picking his nose and eating it. I hope my sister manages to nip it in the bud soon.

From a virological standpoint that really doesn't matter as you also have a mucous membrane inside your nose and the acid in the stomach will probably kill the virus anyway...

   I was thinking the same. Disgusting, but better that he eats it instead of leaving it laying around to possibly infect others.

   Children really are filthy little animals. I know, I was one once.  But this time around, the BIG problem is that they usually don't get sick or even show any sign of being infected so they readily spread the virus, but the virus is deadly to the over 60 YO age group.

You're right about the stomach acid deactivating the virus, but that wasn't my worry. The problem is him putting his dirty fingers up his nose and in his mouth will increase the chances of him picking up viruses, as well as spreading them to others, who come into contact with objects he's touched, with his saliva and mucus coated fingers.

Unfortunately my sister, the children and her husband have recently moved in with his parents, who are >60 and aren't in the best of shape so I do worry about them.

[unknownparticle]

Terrible news, my condolences. 

[SeanB]

Sad to hear, condolences. Neighbour upstairs has a lot of family in Spain, Italy and Guatemala ( go figure, she speaks 8 languages with good fluency, and another 3 or 4 at least well enough to get by) and has had 3 die so far, and another half dozen or so ill with it. But thankfully it seems to be missing immediate family by me, and also the neighbours, even with the high number of doctors living in the same building (3 out of 20) who are still essential services workers.

[DysonDepplbom]

Sorry for your loss. Hope we all learn from your story.

I'm worried about the possible spread on Thanksgiving which is coming up soon. Grandparents want kids over for egg hunt. I'm sure other families will be in same dilemma.

[BrianHG]

My Condolences.

[Adrian_Arg.]

My condolences to you and your family.

[tggzzz]

   The wife of one of my in-laws just passed away this afternoon from covid19.  She was 70 years old and only became ill last Friday.  She had been keeping her 14 YO grand daughter while her mother worked and they think that she caught if from her even though she was asymptomatic.

My condolonces.

Be alert to how the granddaughter might feel, in terms of guilt etc, which can be corrosive over time. Don't presume any such emotions will appear instantly; my daughter had a habit of suddenly talking about feelings that had been briefly mentioned weeks earlier.

I have a 98yo mother. I have made it a point to tell people in advance that they should not feel any guilt if she catches covid-19 and dies. I specifically point out that she could catch it from anybody, so they might not be the cause.

[worsthorse]

   The wife of one of my in-laws just passed away this afternoon from covid19.  She was 70 years old and only became ill last Friday.  She had been keeping her 14 YO grand daughter while her mother worked and they think that she caught if from her even though she was asymptomatic.

My condolonces.

Be alert to how the granddaughter might feel, in terms of guilt etc, which can be corrosive over time. Don't presume any such emotions will appear instantly; my daughter had a habit of suddenly talking about feelings that had been briefly mentioned weeks earlier.

I have a 98yo mother. I have made it a point to tell people in advance that they should not feel any guilt if she catches covid-19 and dies. I specifically point out that she could catch it from anybody, so they might not be the cause.

I am so sorry to hear of your loss and I hope you and your family are getting the support you need. This is a heartbreaking time.

Thinking about her granddaughter... please don't assume that anyone knows where or how her grandma caught the virus. Without testing and contact tracing, it is very difficult to tell. Why risk making anyone suffer guilt in such circumstances?

[tooki]

OP, sorry for your loss.

Staying away from the grandparents may have saved their life.

   That's worth repeating.  Too many people around here use their parents as no-cost baby sitters. Most of them don't seem to know, or care, that that could easily costs their parents their lives in this situation.

This is precisely why Switzerland officially did not close schools per se, but rather canceled classes but (supposedly)* still allowed kids whose parents have to work to go to school somehow and just work in isolation: they expressly did not want grandparents taking care of kids instead.

*Using the weasel words because I honestly don’t know how it’s worked out; every indication I’ve seen is that kids are all staying home. Or worse, going out and playing with other kids, defeating the whole purpose...

[james_s]

It's a serious problem that has occurred to me too. I don't know what the situation is like in other countries but here daycare can easily cost more than one earns in a relatively low wage job and even compared to something paying a decent wage just isn't worth it once you subtract the cost of daycare. With schools suddenly closing that can make it impossible for someone who is otherwise able to work to do so.

Even a lot of my coworkers who already worked remotely much of the time are having more trouble now focusing as their kids are home all the time. For many grandparents have been the default babysitters but now that's exactly not what we want happening.

[Red Squirrel]

Sorry for your loss.

These are really sad times to go through this as family can't really get together to mourn, or when someone does fall terminally ill you can't really be with them either until they pass.  Makes it that much harder.

[richard.cs]

This is precisely why Switzerland officially did not close schools per se, but rather canceled classes but (supposedly)* still allowed kids whose parents have to work to go to school somehow and just work in isolation: they expressly did not want grandparents taking care of kids instead.

Here the official advice is not to send children to their grandparents, and for most people I know that's working out OK as at least one parent is working from home anyway. There are people unable to work because of it though and in some cases they're having to take unpaid leave. I imagine there are a significant number of children with grandparents out of financial necessity. Schools here are staying open with a low staffing level to provide daycare to the children of "key workers" (medical staff, critical supply chain, etc.) only who would otherwise be unable to work.

@Stray Electron, my condolences. I would echo tggzzz's point here - someone needs to keep a good eye on that 14 year old, feelings of guilt over something like that can be pretty devastating at that age.

[Mechatrommer]

my condolences to the world that human made it in the wrong direction imho. one of it is where grandparents have to take care of the grandchildren. i was raised by my parents with very little intervention from their parent, so i will strive to do the same to my kids, even though we went the same direction like everyone else of "both parent" working condition. this is very small and peaceful town so its easy to take care of them sending to schools buying foods etc. everything is 5 minutes drive. and we are lucky to have those good and trustworthy immigrants who can work as babysitter for small amount of money. it hurt me when seeing parents have to do this, sending kids to their grandparents, their hardwork is enough raising us it should be the time to pay them back by taking care of them in return, not to give more burden. my condolences to the OP too but one man/woman gone is for another millions' lesson. we can take lesson from this covid situation or, we can curse, its our choice. its us who made it happened, not anything else imho.

[HobGoblyn]

 Very sorry to hear, my condolences.

One of my wife’s elderly clients has lost two nephews and another two are in intensive care, all to Covid 19.  All in their 60s, don’t think they had underlying health issues,  I do wonder in this case whether something genetic might be making her family more prone to it, it could simply be bad luck.