I run some sites, one of which includes a forum running on the same software as here. The forum we run is a bit bigger than this one (about four to six times, in terms of posts, topics, members) and also has image attachments too like here.
The MySQL database itself is roughly 4Gb.
I'm not going to go into very specific details of the server setup for security reasons, but very broadly we have found high performance with 4 CPU cores and just 8Gb allocated to it.
We own our own kit, co-locate them at a local datacentre, and then vitualize on those servers.
To reduce load, and to distribute content quickly we use Amazon's AWS Cloudfront this is a Content Distribution Network (CDN). This is really easy to set up with this forum software.
For resilience in case of downtime, we use Amazon's AWS Route 53 so we can point the DNS to another copy of the sites. As on AWS you just pay for what you use, all that's needed is the data stored, and then spin up a large instance when this happens. We have a micro instance spinning all the time just with the configs set up on it, and doing little disaster recovery jobs for us.
This last bit is probably the bit that really is handy, because of the short TTL (time to live) of the DNS on Route 53 we really can move so a new site very quickly when things go wrong.
The outgoing mail from the servers are handled by an external email handling organisation. That takes a huge burden off the servers, especially the forum, with all the notifications. This handles bounced emails and the like and the option for people to opt-out of emails and never get bothered by us again.
We also use another company for email whitelisting (which we had to jump through a few hoops to get certified) so that the notification emails get through spam filters as we adhere to good industry practices.
Another good thing of this, is if we do get prolonged downtime, we can still contact people by email.
Incoming emails are handled by a cloud-based ticketing system. This takes a burden off our server as it's not getting hammered by spammy emails. It also allows us to offer support and answer questions even if the site is down.
As far as a "hot spare" then then the lost revenue due to maximum anticipated downtime needs to be accounted for.
A live copy of the database for the forum can be achieved by using two MySQL instances, in a Master-Slave setup. The slave can be on a very low spec machine, it will just catch up when it can.
As an aside, for very short physical downtimes, I've even set up a Raspberry Pi with NGINX that displays a "Down for maintenance" that I plug the relevant ethernet cable into when I'm at the datacentre running off an USB batterypack (because you can't start plugging things in willy-nilly).
As far as legal threats on taking down the site, we identified that too as one of the biggest threats of downtime too. We've reduced this risk by being as above-board as we possibly can.
I do most of the sysadmin, but I do have a contract with a linux support company which I can turn to when I feel out of my depth, or I need a shoulder to cry on (in Linux terms anyway).
If you did want to host in a country that is well placed geographically and is a popular place for websites that my be under higher risk of legal scrutiny, then Iceland has a whole industry set up for this.
SO in summary (phew) you could stay with Hostgator if you wanted to, just add layers above it for added reliability, flexibility and improved performance (which results in increased revenue).
Gnif is doing a great job, not to be gniffed at.
Trys