iXsystems' hardware requirements are quite broad. See:
https://www.truenas.com/docs/core/gettingstarted/corehardwareguide/They don't recommend ECC as a requirement, but says you can use it. Since their appliances are designed for enterprise, of course they would come with ECC RAM. Most, if not all, enterprise gear does.
I appreciate your analogies vad, but I don't think you're making a very strong argument. ZFS is a resilient filesystem
by design and it's certainly lived up to that design in real-world applications for quite a long time.
If you can demonstrate ZFS pool corruption on a PC by simply yanking the power cord or causing the OS to crash, I'll stand to be corrected. Use the cheapest, crappiest hardware if you like, as long as it meets their requirements. However based on many years of experience in this industry, I haven't seen it happen unless there is some underlying cause that hasn't been addressed (which I usually chop up to user error). As they say, the proof is in the pudding. If you can show me that ZFS is "intolerant to crashes" (your words, not mine), then I will withdraw my earlier statements. And by "show", I don't just mean some vague forum post, anyone can cherry pick comments on the internet, but I mean actual proper evidence of this alleged weakness in ZFS.
You've already claimed that "If the NAS crashes before it syncs pending metadata changes to disks (where metadata stands for file allocation tables of the beautiful COW file system), your entire ZFS pool will be lost with little prospect of recovery" which is demonstrably false, so I'm sorry, I don't have a lot of faith in your advice.