General > General Technical Chat
Stuck in a rut for years
EEVblog:
--- Quote from: hans on November 04, 2022, 08:06:02 pm ---On a related note.. read the wikipedia article on anhedonia. It's not a pretty subject as it's intensely linked to depression.. but basically it describes that typical people will have 2 types of ways to enjoy an activity: it's the anticipation for an activity, and the actual execution of that activity. Some people may not find joy in telling everyone they're going for an epic bike ride that weekend, but can still make themselves do it and actually like it.
--- End quote ---
Reminds me of my gym classes. I still (eagerly) get off my arse 3-4 times a week and go to the gym to do a group class. Not because I feel the need to stay fit or my health will turn to crap if I don't etc, but simply because I enjoy being in a group class for some reason(s).
I can't get the same enthusiasm for just going to the gym and working out on my own, it's not the same feeling. Same thing, but the difference is in the group class.
Don't know what it is exactly, might be that I get to say hi to people, might be that I like the motivation of being with others with workouts, might be that I secretly like beign an exhibitionist and showing off my fitness abilities, might be that I like watching people start out and helping them, might be that I like talking to the hot girls in their gym outfits. All I know is that it makes all the difference that it's a class.
Probably at 5000 BodyPump classes now, maybe 2000 BodyCombat classes, and a hundreds of Grid, boxing, and cross train type classes. Enthusiam level still the same after 25+ years.
You need to find what is "addictive" and hence easy to get off your arse for. If you are lucky then it's something productive or beneficial to your life.
jpanhalt:
--- Quote from: eti on November 05, 2022, 12:50:52 am ---You speak through the lens of your own experiences, successes, failures, life, etc. Individuals have individual, made-to-fit lives - what works well for one, doesn’t work for the other. I sense you are “projecting” based on the extreme details in your message.
--- End quote ---
Of course my advice is based on experience. That's what you asked for. Call it projecting if you want. Nothing wrong with projecting when giving advice. Apply it as it might fit you. However, it seems your consistent rejection of good advice has not worked well for you as you are now "stuck in a rut."
Your comments directed at me about saying that you do not reply in a time manner are misdirected. I suggested no such thing.
--- Quote from: eti ---PS: My mindset is not one of complaint - I’m open and frank about how I feel. It doesn’t matter how you feel about me, we are strangers to one another. Maybe try a less accusatory approach.
--- End quote ---
If you are happy with being in a rut, why start this thread? The key that I see to your situation is that you want just fun in an occupation. As soon as someone makes a demand on you or your time that is "not fun" you either quit or precipitate your own firing.
In all my years, I did things in order to succeed that I didn't enjoy or feel I needed to do. Call that projecting, if you want, but I have never known anyone in a meaningful profession or job who didn't do the same.
EEVBlog's experience in gym classes can be extrapolated to many activities. In college, a small group of us (never more than 4) studied together in preparing for exams. It was fun and helped get something that was not fun done. In graduate school, we had weekly research group meetings. In my working years, our procedure manuals needed to be reviewed and revised yearly. That is not fun by yourself, but we did it as a group and got it done more easily. It's a long list of examples. In other words, find a way to make those activities you dislike doing less disagreeable while still getting them done. Don't ever refuse to do something you are asked to do, even if it is not a demand.
hans:
--- Quote from: EEVblog on November 05, 2022, 09:18:45 am ---Reminds me of my gym classes. I still (eagerly) get off my arse 3-4 times a week and go to the gym to do a group class. Not because I feel the need to stay fit or my health will turn to crap if I don't etc, but simply because I enjoy being in a group class for some reason(s).
I can't get the same enthusiasm for just going to the gym and working out on my own, it's not the same feeling. Same thing, but the difference is in the group class.
Don't know what it is exactly, might be that I get to say hi to people, might be that I like the motivation of being with others with workouts, might be that I secretly like beign an exhibitionist and showing off my fitness abilities, might be that I like watching people start out and helping them, might be that I like talking to the hot girls in their gym outfits. All I know is that it makes all the difference that it's a class.
Probably at 5000 BodyPump classes now, maybe 2000 BodyCombat classes, and a hundreds of Grid, boxing, and cross train type classes. Enthusiam level still the same after 25+ years.
You need to find what is "addictive" and hence easy to get off your arse for. If you are lucky then it's something productive or beneficial to your life.
--- End quote ---
I've had the same with swimming. I like swimming but the step of going there alone was a major hurdle for me. So I started out with a few classmates after studying, once a week. I suppose swimming can be the worst of examples if one has body image issues, but honestly I know my friends don't judge and that I shouldn't care about others. Eventually I added 2x per week by myself, which was great for my fitness and doing more swimming, but other than that it can be a bit boring.
I imagine going to a scheduled class also means that there is no possibility for procrastination. You can't prioritize some fun other thing you're drawn into , as the class starts at e.g. 6PM and not at 8PM which would secretly suit you better. You can't postpone it to tomorrow, because there is no class. You can't skip to the next class as it may be next week, or if you meet people that you like to hang out with, you'd have to cancel them or miss out on the down-time. At this point it's not all about enjoying the workout, but getting yourself in a mindset to do so.
As I pointed out with my work, some grind things I just need to stumble upon myself to be in the right mindset. I'd love to be a robot and be able to write a paper any day of the week and have it done. And pause/resume at completely free will. But it doesn't work for me like that. At work I very often have productivity in terms of a sine wave with a period of approximately 1-2 weeks. There are days where I'm just reading and reiterating existing work. On other days I will type so much the keyboard would have overheated and purely on feeling, I've "caught up" on a weeks of work. If I start writing a paper, I like to do it in 2 or 3 consecutive days and be done with it. HR would probably say it's not healthy to lock myself in a room like that for focus, but I guess that's just how my mind works on these kinds of things.
Oh, and I disagree that a boss shouldn't care about these things. They absolutely should! I think a 'good boss' is far more valuable than having slightly more interesting work. Sure I wouldn't be happy doing production work instead of design work even if the boss is great.. but I personally don't think the choice of e.g. automotive vs medical industry is more dominant than finding a great boss.
I've been in a work downtime for a pretty time now, and now that I'm rebooting myself into work I'm rediscovering and trying to reinvent my workstyle for all these things. I've the luck of being at a larger company where they have experience with people that have extra needs. It's not always about the production output but also about the process. If you can work 70hrs a week without health issues, and love to go the extra mile for some reward, then there is nothing wrong with that. But if those 70hrs are a way of coping with other stuff, e.g. as you could say it's 'presenteeism', then that requires attention. I don't think it's a lack of willpower or being lazy. I'm not sure how things are arranged in the UK or other countries, but the employer's responsibility, possibility for sick leave and job coaching varies greatly.. unfortunately.
EEVblog:
--- Quote from: hans on November 05, 2022, 11:17:14 am ---I've had the same with swimming. I like swimming but the step of going there alone was a major hurdle for me. So I started out with a few classmates after studying, once a week. I suppose swimming can be the worst of examples if one has body image issues, but honestly I know my friends don't judge and that I shouldn't care about others. Eventually I added 2x per week by myself, which was great for my fitness and doing more swimming, but other than that it can be a bit boring.
--- End quote ---
The other thing with workouts (and you can extend this to other things like work) is that if you have to do it meet an end goal (health, rehab etc) then you are less likely to do it if the end goal is the only motivation. But if you devise or find a system whereby you get a little dopamine hit every time by doing the thing, then that's going to help motivate you to do it every time. The end goal eventually comes, but that's wasn't the reason you did it, you did it because you wanted that little dopamine hit. It could be that nice smoothie you get at the cafe after the class, or talking to or checking out that hot gym instructor, or showing of your form, or walking or riding your bike to get there or whatever it is.
Systems work better than goals.
--- Quote ---I imagine going to a scheduled class also means that there is no possibility for procrastination. You can't prioritize some fun other thing you're drawn into , as the class starts at e.g. 6PM and not at 8PM which would secretly suit you better. You can't postpone it to tomorrow, because there is no class. You can't skip to the next class as it may be next week, or if you meet people that you like to hang out with, you'd have to cancel them or miss out on the down-time. At this point it's not all about enjoying the workout, but getting yourself in a mindset to do so.
--- End quote ---
I've said it many times, but engineers LOVE deadlines, they thrive on it. Same can work for gym classes or other things you need to get done. If you can put a system in place to force deadlines on yourself than that can vastly improve your productivity in getting things done.
eti:
--- Quote from: jpanhalt on November 05, 2022, 10:21:34 am ---
--- Quote from: eti on November 05, 2022, 12:50:52 am ---You speak through the lens of your own experiences, successes, failures, life, etc. Individuals have individual, made-to-fit lives - what works well for one, doesn’t work for the other. I sense you are “projecting” based on the extreme details in your message.
--- End quote ---
Of course my advice is based on experience. That's what you asked for. Call it projecting if you want. Nothing wrong with projecting when giving advice. Apply it as it might fit you. However, it seems your consistent rejection of good advice has not worked well for you as you are now "stuck in a rut."
Your comments directed at me about saying that you do not reply in a time manner are misdirected. I suggested no such thing.
--- Quote from: eti ---PS: My mindset is not one of complaint - I’m open and frank about how I feel. It doesn’t matter how you feel about me, we are strangers to one another. Maybe try a less accusatory approach.
--- End quote ---
If you are happy with being in a rut, why start this thread? The key that I see to your situation is that you want just fun in an occupation. As soon as someone makes a demand on you or your time that is "not fun" you either quit or precipitate your own firing.
In all my years, I did things in order to succeed that I didn't enjoy or feel I needed to do. Call that projecting, if you want, but I have never known anyone in a meaningful profession or job who didn't do the same.
EEVBlog's experience in gym classes can be extrapolated to many activities. In college, a small group of us (never more than 4) studied together in preparing for exams. It was fun and helped get something that was not fun done. In graduate school, we had weekly research group meetings. In my working years, our procedure manuals needed to be reviewed and revised yearly. That is not fun by yourself, but we did it as a group and got it done more easily. It's a long list of examples. In other words, find a way to make those activities you dislike doing less disagreeable while still getting them done. Don't ever refuse to do something you are asked to do, even if it is not a demand.
--- End quote ---
** This is appalling "advice". Thanks for trying to help, I know your intentions are good.
Navigation
[0] Message Index
[#] Next page
[*] Previous page
Go to full version