| General > General Technical Chat |
| Stuck in a rut for years |
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| hans:
It's a little ironic, then again everyone can respond in an emotional manner from time to time.. however I've sat in therapy rooms where I've seen the exact same thing happen. People literally fled to breathe fresh air. Confrontation is never easy and not best done (e.g. hard to do) over written mediums via internet, in my honest opinion. Communication about this stuff in-person is often not easy as it already is, as certain details can be left unspoken about that you can spot with body language (which we can't over internet). Every confrontation or "advice" from someone else has a certain bias and possibly mismatch from that person as well. In my [group] therapy experience I had during burnout, I've had explained that one of the main rules is to not give advice. You can share experiences, offer them to help or invite them, but only if the other person asks as in the end people can only fix themselves, as harsh as that may sound sometimes. As I said w.r.t. jobcoaching and relationships with employers, or every other relationship; don't get me wrong.. there still needs to be a clear ownership of who's 'stuff' is on who to fix. No one is perfect. 2 people that are arguing together almost always means 2 people are at fault, as each person has had chances to deescalate, forgive or react in more emphatic vs confrontational ways. If you can identify personally what you're struggling with, what ways there are to improve and cope, then all the power to you. |
| SiliconWizard:
Haven't read it all here. But just stating the obvious. If one feels "stuck", there's an obvious cure: just start moving. Start doing something. Almost anything will do. The rest will unfold. You can't expect to get out of a rut if you keep procrastinating. |
| thm_w:
--- Quote from: ebastler on November 05, 2022, 09:58:22 pm ---Without exception, you have only acknowledged comments so far which told you what you wanted to hear, and have procrastinated on or rejected other advice. I hope that rut you are stuck in is comfortable enough, since you seem bound to stay in there. Nevertheless I have one more suggestion to offer. From your posting stats and recent post timestamps, it seems that you have established a daily rhythm where you are awake through the night and probably sleep during the day. If this is not related to some night-shift job but is your personal choice, I would strongly suggest that you try switching this around. Walks in the sunlight and interactions with other people are good for most of us, and missing out on them may drag you down. And just changing something in your life may be a first step to getting out of that rut, by giving you a fresh perspective and signaling to yourself that things are in motion. Apologies if this should come across as too intrusive or if I misinterpreted your posting times. And cof course you are free to reject or procrastinate... ::) --- End quote --- Good that someone checked, not too surprised. It is incredibly difficult to be healthy, motivated, and useful if you are not awake during normal daylight hours, and get some level of exercise. Sure some people can do it, but the majority? no. |
| jonpaul:
pick a life goal, focus on accomplishing it become an optimist sulking, complaining and grudge does nothing think like an airline pilot, surgeon or battlefield commander Jon |
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