The ashes 2015

[abaxas]

For all of you who don't know.... England regained the ashes.

[Deathwish]

who died then, lala , po, tinkywinky or the other one.

[German_EE]

For those of you not familiar with cricket it's a game with its origins in an obscure sexual ceremony, the object being to 'bowl a maiden over'.

[SeanB]

For those of you not familiar with cricket it's a game with its origins in an obscure sexual ceremony, the object being to 'bowl a maiden over'.

I thought it was an old English rain ceremony. You get all these men out on a specially prepared field in white, one stands in the middle and throws a red ball, and one hits it and others catch it. Then it starts to rain......

[KJDS]

For the benefit of the Americans, and other uncivilized places, here's and explanation of the game.

Cricket: As explained to a foreigner...

You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out. When they are all out, the side that's out comes in and the side that's been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out.
When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in. There are two men called umpires who stay all out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out.
When both sides have been in and all the men have out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game!

[SeanB]

For the benefit of the Americans, and other uncivilized places, here's and explanation of the game.

Cricket: As explained to a foreigner...

You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out. When they are all out, the side that's out comes in and the side that's been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out.
When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in. There are two men called umpires who stay all out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out.
When both sides have been in and all the men have out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game!

And, if that is not enough to decide, they call in Duckworth Lewis, who will decide the outcome for them.

[Mechanical Menace]

For those of you not familiar with cricket it's a game with its origins in an obscure sexual ceremony, the object being to 'bowl a maiden over'.

I thought it was an old English rain ceremony. You get all these men out on a specially prepared field in white, one stands in the middle and throws a red ball, and one hits it and others catch it. Then it starts to rain......

Cricket: As explained to a foreigner...

snip...

I think foreigners should explain it to us. I don't even know why wer have a team when nobody outside of Australia, Pakistan, and India even care about it or know it's going on.

[SeanB]

You forgot South Africa, I work near the stadium.

[Bob F.]

You forgot South Africa, I work near the stadium.

and the West Indies...

Wish I DID live near a stadium there   

[Mechanical Menace]

You forgot South Africa, I work near the stadium.

and the West Indies...

Wish I DID live near a stadium there   

I pass by Headingly stadium almost daily, only recently found out they don't just play Rugby there...

[Deathwish]

The only time a group of men dressed in near virginal white can stand in a public area, rub their big red balls on the outside of their groin area as half a world sits in awe and they dont get arrested 

[SeanB]

It is a 10 minute walk, and I used to live where I could see what was going on in half the field, provided I went up to the roof with binoculars.


BTW, there are 3 stadia right next to each other, one for Cricket, one for Rugby and one for Soccer. Now the city management ( true oxymoron there) wants to build another soccer stadium, even though the new one they built for 2010 is sitting empty for the most part, and want to displace the century old Stables to get it's land. 100 years of horse poop, and they want to do contact sport on it, hope all the players get free Tetanus shots, because that is not a nice thing. My only well ingrained childhood memory........

[GreyWoolfe]

For the benefit of the Americans, and other uncivilized places, here's and explanation of the game.

Cricket: As explained to a foreigner...

You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out. When they are all out, the side that's out comes in and the side that's been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out.
When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in. There are two men called umpires who stay all out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out.
When both sides have been in and all the men have out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game!

You have made it perfectly understandable.  I should have no problem with string theory now.

[abaxas]

Test cricket is easy to explain.

It's up to 5x  7-8 hour heavy drinking sessions.

[KJDS]

Test cricket is easy to explain.

It's up to 5x  7-8 hour heavy drinking sessions.

I've stood up at the end of a days play to applaud before, as has everyone round me, and at least a third of them have collapsed.

[Dave Turner]

Yawn!