"Probably" So you have not looked? The only issue with switching an inductive load is the need for snubbing. Water heaters are not very inductive and EVs are also not very inductive.
I did look, I investigated quite thoroughly after trying to use a Sonoff Pow to control power to my air compressor, it worked great for about a week and then burned up the relay (and melted the terminals where the wires connect) despite being rated for 16A and the compressor draws only 10A. I said "probably" because I don't remember the precise value which varies a bit from one relay to another and can't be bothered to look it up again. Snubbing does not solve the problem of inrush current, LRA on an electric motor can be 5x-10x the rated current and transformers and other inductive loads draw a significant surge as well. I bought a 30A furnace contactor on ebay for around 10 bucks and that does the job.
Water heaters, yes they're as close to an ideal resistive load as you're going to find. EVs I assume are power factor corrected. Still it's worth being aware that inexpensive devices like the Sonoff switches are probably rated in Chinese amps, ie take the printed specs with a grain of salt, personally I would not expect them to hold up to more than about half the rated load long term, but used with this in mind they work really well.
There's not much in low price devices that isn't designed and made in China. I've been using an Ankuoo switch for some years now to control the times my EV charges with no signs of wear with 12 amp loads. There aren't many devices that are permitted to draw more than 12 amps from a 15 amp circuit. Most devices have to be derated to 80% of the circuit capacity.
Part of the reason I want a timer to control a relay driving the load is to use it with 240V higher current loads like the water heater and a 240V connection to the EV. Charging a car on a US 120V outlet suffices for many needs, but only 95% of the time. Other times you want a faster charge so it is fully up in the morning after coming home with a low state of charge the night before. Even a 40 amp circuit at 240V will bring an EV up to full charge overnight.
As to your relay problem, the start up current is not a big deal as it is over quickly. Current is a thermal issue that has to be present for some time to damage the contacts. Opening the contacts interrupts the current flow resulting in a very high kickback voltage from the motor inductance with a substantial arc across the contacts. This is very damaging and will burn out the relay contacts regardless of the rating, it just takes a bit longer. Electric motors are typically not snubbed and so the relay contacts suffer the full brunt. Add a snubber and your relays will hold up much better.