That's good, I guess there is still chance that we are not entirely wrong about everything
How does the output current depend on pin 5 voltage and does it turn on at something like 1.25V or Vout-1.25V? That would suggest an adjustable voltage regulator. If not, I don't know, maybe a fixed regulator with shutdown (at least 5V) or just a stupid high side switch.
The other structure (at the bottom) appears to be nothing more than a clamp catching power supply going 6V below zero and/or above some threshold (apparently higher than 12V that was tested). I don't get it, is it meant for automotive use?
I can't find any reasonable datasheet. Buck regulators like L200 have different pinout, smart switches are all the VN series, I think 100% CMOS (but I could be wrong), linear LDOs have outputs on pin 5.
edit
I forgot to add previously, one reason I think that pin 1 is VCC is because there is 6.7V breakdown going from pin 2 to pin 1 (and even less when ground is connected). So if the chip were to take power on pin 2 and output on pin 1, it would fail with more than a few volts of supply. Erm, screw that, it wouldn't work at all with ground connected because of the leakage to pin 1 capable of pulling 1kΩ to 4V and possibly more.
edit edit
Well, unless the "leakage" is part of intended operation
But the breakdown is very fishy, I wouldn't want an IC working at more than 5V to behave like that when it loses ground connection.