What exactly is the RC/RL load in this setup and how much current goes through the device in normal usage?
If the failure occurs when plugged in but the triac is not turned on, perhaps you are exceeding the dV/dt(off) spec. If it occurs when the triac turns on as power is applied, then perhaps dI/dt is the issue. Either way, the fix may be an inductor, perhaps with some resistance, in series with the load. Being more generous with the RC snubber might help too.
As for why it happens in the field but not in your lab, have you tried actually plugging them in manually? Does the device draw any power as it is plugged in? If so, there might be a bit of arcing that makes things worse. Also, once a device has been plugged in without a failure, does that device then work properly indefinitely even when moved or unplugged/plugged? That might mean that some of the devices are a bit more fragile than others, which would be expected I suppose.