Anyone still looking to make their own adapters, I just got around to it.
After long hours of looking I found these are connectors are still available.
TE Connectivity 280595 receptacle housing 12 position.
TE Connectivity 182198-1 Tin contact, crimp. (Gold flash also available.)
Crimping tool, I used the PA-09
Cut down housing to 11 positions, file off protrusions except for wire entry side.
Apologies, the solution to the high force may be obvious to some but to avoid possible damage the connector needs to be filed down.
I do have one original HP adapter and I measured it as 5.85mm. I measured the replacement connector as 6.25mm. Anyway filing both sides down to less than 6mm fixes the high force. The polycarbonate is easy to work with a rough file.
Please note, it takes some force to seat the connector and to remove it. My concern is the ceramic PCB but so far so good.