Well tarn-x will leave it looking crappy but it should strip the contaminants.
You need to re seal it with something like deoxit after wards to keep it looking fresh.
If you use it, do 30 second intervals. Pull it out and inspect. When it looks uniformly matte without the black, its done. A pre-soak in tarn-x before using polishing cream might result in less work.. but the polishing cream will def leave a nicer finish.
The only realistic solution for polishing this stuff is electropolishing. If something has a thick silver plating it might work.
You can also electroclean silver and gold. I have done a gold test fixture recently with electrocleaning, it did end up looking alot nicer. Its cheap. Polishing on precious metals I have not tried because platings are often very thin, they are not making it jewelry grade for everyday wear.
Think about it like alien. Tarn-x gets rid of the alien but the structural damage it caused is still there, its like mechanical damage. A light electropolish might get rid of some asparaties near the craters left by heavy oxidation. But its not gonna work miracles.
Chemical polishing is a thing though, for instance with TIG electrodes. If you dip a tungsten rod into a molten sodium nitrite salt, it will leave it as a nicely rounded blunt tip. That is good to keep in mind when you think about what chemical polishing and machining does.
With advanced electronic/fluidic controls, you can do things like remove burrs specifically, or even do surface polishing while leaving edge geometry in tact (i.e. endmill processing) but its damn hard to figure out how to do any of this.
And what you really want, is electroplasma polishing. That process does what people expect electrochemical polishing to do. But its rather power hungry and dangerous and not much info is available about it.
The problem is current density. You will never get it nice. Electroplasma polishing solves this problem by basically creating plasma around the entire part like a envelope, and the current density in this region is rather uniform from what I understand.
TO get anywhere near similar results conventionally on something complex like a BNC, you would need to get a little electrode on a multi axis positioner, and basically "machine" the object while under water, moving the electrode around as polishing progresses. Damn hard. For attempting plasma electrolytic polishing, you need something between 0.2 to 1 amp per square cm. So like a BNC connector is a Kw+ precision adjustable HV power supply.
TLDR: anything cosmetic on complicated shapes is damn hard, especially like the interior of connectors. A quick electroclean, tarn-x dip, electropolish, etc... should improve surface condition but it won't look new by any means. Mechanical polishing using small tools with creams and abrasives can result in a nice surface, if you don't mind a ton of annoying work, and the object has a thick plating.
What I go for on BNC (when to stop working):
1) exterior looks nice
2) feels smooth to plug in a cable
3) no visible bumps of corrosion (protrusions)
4) deoxit seal