- Z80 can still be found (a random "Z80 Aliexpress" search shows they are less than $1,
https://pt.aliexpress.com/item/32519338899.html)
- To add memory to a Z80, buy memory chips then read the processor and the memory datasheets to see how to interconnect them
- Z80 family works at 5V. A minimal system doesn't need much glue logic, so it can be done with gate logic ICs (i.e. 7400 family) maybe a couple of multiplexer if you choose dynamic RAM chips, but nowadays there are plenty of static RAM choices instead dynamic. It can be done without CPLDs.
- Z80 can address 64KB of memory. You can map it upon wish, or you can use the memory map of some vintage Z80 based computer (there never was a single standard in memory mapping, and probably never will), if you choose to make yours compatible with any of the existing designs.
- To see how fast it can run, you need to read the datasheets. 1-4 MHz is normal range for vintage computers. There are also microcontrollers based on Z80 or Z8 core that can run 10 times faster, or so.
- There are plenty of assemblers and C compilers for Z80. A "GCC Z80" search will return plenty of options.
- About how different, it was like that: First it was Intel8080, then a few guys left intel, made their own company named Zilog and designed an even better version of 8080, named Z80. Z80 was very successful at the time. Remember we are now during CP/M era, way before first IBM PC or Microsoft (MS/DOS). Then it was Intel 8088, then Intel 80188, then Intel 80286 (short called 286), then 386, 486, Pentium, and so on and so forth up to nowadays latest i7/i9/Xeon whatever or similar from AMD (the AM2900 bitslice family were from AMD, too, but before the microprocessors era). All the above, from I8080 to the latest multicore Xeon can still run 8080 (or Z80) code, they are still
backwards compatible (at binary code level) after so many decades.
Anyways, by the question you are asking I think you want to know more only about the specific architecture of IBM PC, or what we now call a "desktop PC", and not about (digital) computers architecture in general, which is broader than IBM PC, the popular instance of the many existing computer architectures out there.
Motorola (6800/68000) family was very successful too (not code compatible with Intel), it was used in the first Apple computers, but at some point Apple dropped Motorola, and switched to Intel.
Detail a little what kind of computers do you have in mind when saying "vintage" computers? What period of time are you aiming at?
At an extreme, analog computers are "the most vintage" ones
, very interesting architectures and very different from the digital ones, but completely unrelated to what we know and use now in programming/computer science.