Okay, so back again.
I realised I was being a dumbass and worrying about nothing with the reverse voltage business.
So, I ordered a few opto-couplers and began to do some experiments on breadboard. Unfortunately, I began to blow the opto-couplers left and right. The LED sides were dead. Huh, what gives? Maybe too much current, so changed the resistors to allow the bare minimum - 10K both sides. No dice, optos still failing after a while. Okay, maybe I do need to handle reverse current after all?Put some 1N4148s in series. But blew another couple of optos! Alright, in parallel then. Nope, more dead components.
I was tearing my hair out at this point, double-checking everything in my test circuit. WTF, do I have a bad batch of opto-couplers or something?
I mentioned my problem to a relative and they told me how I could make absolutely sure to prevent reverse voltage problems using 3V zener diodes in parallel. I was about to order some zeners (and more optos!) when, after staring for too long at the same circuit diagram I posted last, I suddenly realised what my problem was!
The ****ing switch is not perfect, and on the odd occasion (particularly when mashing on the buttons) is making a short circuit path through a pair of optos. The LEDs were being killed by excess
forward current, not reverse!
I can't change anything about the switch, so I thought I need to put some current limiting in elsewhere. I think on the ground pin off the switch - perhaps a 1K resistor. So that'll make 11K total (assuming I continue to use 10K) on the LEDs in normal operation, which doesn't affect much, and in case of switch shorting, max of about 10mA through the LEDs. Sounds good?