What are your favourite worthless auction phrases?

[imidis]

This isn't from an auction site, but... "Like new, mint condition, excellent shape, does not turn on" For a galaxy s6 $150 

[bitseeker]

Prediction for the next generation of useless auction phrase:

"AI-based, like new, rare, IoT, pulled from working environment, 100% functional prior to being stored, selling as-is due to lack of knowledge or resources. Free shipping!"

[OE2WHP]

My favorites:

- Turns on but can't test it because I have no clue what it is...
- Oscilloscopes where the text says "trace still very sharp" but the picture is blurry as hell...go figure...
- Selling for a deceased ham. I'm sure it was working when he used it last time..... oh really? When was that? 30 years ago?

[Crazy_Engineer]

My favorites:

- Turns on but can't test it because I have no clue what it is...

Those are annoying, but sometimes they honestly don know what they are doing.  I managed to get a working HP power supply for 20 bucks because the seller didn't know the difference between the negative terminal and earth ground.  He had plugged a 12V light bulb into + and earth ground and was wondering why the bulb didn't light up.

[bitseeker]

Yeah, buying stuff from the clueless can be a great bargain. It just depends on your risk tolerance and/or willingness to fix it if it has surprises.

[ChrisLX200]

'Easy repair' - yeah, if it's that easy why didn't you do it?

[Po6ept]

'Easy repair' - yeah, if it's that easy why didn't you do it?

"Easy repair" is almost inevitably followed by, "probably a bad capacitor".  They even diagnose it for you!

[Tony_G]

My current annoyance is sellers who will show you photos of random stuff but never the details on the red calibration reject tags...

[bitseeker]

A related thing with photos is when a seller includes 12 pics, but it's three copies each of only four different images.

[Brumby]

Then there's the step up from that where they do take individual photos - but two or three of them are from almost identical angles and show no additional information.

[Halcyon]

Personally I vote for the "Pulled from a ..." as the all-time most worthless phrase.

I think I agree with you there. In addition, I'm seeing phrases such as "Working pull", "Server pull" etc... making their way into listings. I guess they are attempting to sound more "techy" by using buzz words that are completely made up. In Australia "pull" tends to have a different connotation.

Depending on the item, I've also seen things like "Stored in a climate and humidity controlled environment"... in other words, it sat in a room fitted with an air conditioner.

It also frustrates me that some people try and flog crappy computers from the early 2010's as "vintage".

[Chris-IP5]

I asked a seller a question about a PSU I was interested in buying. He replied simply "It does what the advert says". Turned out it didn't do much properly.

"Photo is of the item for sale" ... is that the only good thing going for it?

[tggzzz]

"Photo is of the item for sale" ... is that the only good thing going for it?

If that is all the advert said, that is a valid point. But too many adverts contain stock images, or there are several second-hand devices with one "representative" image.

[tggzzz]

Depending on the item, I've also seen things like "Stored in a climate and humidity controlled environment"... in other words, it sat in a room fitted with an air conditioner.

Might be better than a garage, loft, or barn - and all of those are possible.

[grumpydoc]

My favorites:

- Turns on but can't test it because I have no clue what it is...

Those are annoying, but sometimes they honestly don know what they are doing.  I managed to get a working HP power supply for 20 bucks because the seller didn't know the difference between the negative terminal and earth ground.  He had plugged a 12V light bulb into + and earth ground and was wondering why the bulb didn't light up.

However, quite a lot of the time when you explore the "can't test it because I have no clue what it is" you discover that the seller has loads of other test equipment for sale which would be more than enough to demonstrate the item in question.

[tggzzz]

My favorites:

- Turns on but can't test it because I have no clue what it is...

Those are annoying, but sometimes they honestly don know what they are doing.  I managed to get a working HP power supply for 20 bucks because the seller didn't know the difference between the negative terminal and earth ground.  He had plugged a 12V light bulb into + and earth ground and was wondering why the bulb didn't light up.

However, quite a lot of the time when you explore the "can't test it because I have no clue what it is" you discover that the seller has loads of other test equipment for sale which would be more than enough to demonstrate the item in question.

Yes, in which case there are possibilities:

• seller is a buy it and sell it quick dealer
• if not, the phrase does provide useful information

[Towger]

400W HF Amplifer (aka burner!)

Spares and Repairs: "LEDs no longer light up".

Reality= I 'had a go' at fixing it with a 500w soldering gun, by re soldering random joints all over the board.  Splattered burnt flux everywhere, lifted but repaired several tracks.

Solution: Cleaned PCB with IPA, tidied up several 're soldered' joints and tracks.  Replaced 3 burnt out fuse holders.

Success.

[grumpydoc]

Yes, in which case there are possibilities:

• seller is a buy it and sell it quick dealer
• if not, the phrase does provide useful information

Indeed.

When I was younger several of us from our small town computer club would frequent radio rallies - for the general electronics rather than the ham stuff.

We found it amusing (and pretty obvious) that vendors who had obviously acquired a job lot of some particular item had two piles on sale - "tested and working" and "untested". 

[Tony_G]

We found it amusing (and pretty obvious) that vendors who had obviously acquired a job lot of some particular item had two piles on sale - "tested and working" and "untested". 

Exactly. Any equipment offered by a T&M vendor that is marked "untested" should really be considered:

• Broken
• Scavenged of rare/expensive bits
• Both

I get it that sometimes they can't afford to test everything but then they should simply plan for some of it returning rather than weaseling away under a "As-Is" banner.

TonyG

[mdszy]

Just gotta say I'm thankful for this thread, it's helping me learn how to write better eBay item descriptions and include better photos! 

[bitseeker]

Excellent!

[Halcyon]

Just gotta say I'm thankful for this thread, it's helping me learn how to write better eBay item descriptions and include better photos! 

Just remain factual, concise and avoid trying to "tart up" the item you're selling. By all means describe the condition if it's not already clear from the photos but avoid using terms like "mint condition" because it's all relative. What might be "mint" to some people is far from the dictionary definition, especially if you're talking about a used item.

If there are faults or flaws with the item, even if it's just a scratch or there are some marks due to regular use, then say so. It's not just about what you say, but also what you don't say. If I see a listing with barely a sentence, I usually skip it because to me, the seller is being dishonest or deliberately trying to hide something.

That being said, don't go over-board, having sold thousands of items over the years, there is one thing I've noticed and that is people are stupid and don't read what they are actually bidding on. For example: Shipping -- If it's a large or bulky item that is impractical to ship, I will clearly specify in coloured, bold, underlined text that the item is for "pick up only from x location on certain days, between certain hours" but I can guarantee I'll get some muppet who will ask for a shipping estimate or they'll bid on it (and sometimes win the auction) with no intention of picking it up.

Also, don't use ebay wanker buzzwords like some of the ones mentioned in this thread. It's not only cringe-worthy but it makes you look like some kind of shonky used-car salesman. If I see a listing full of crap like that and trying to make something appear "rare" and "unique", I won't bid on it.

Final tip, take your own photos, don't just copy stock product photos from Google image search. People want to see the actual item they are bidding on, not a photoshopped marketing image. Again, it comes down to your reputation, if you're copying someone else's photos, I'll be thinking you are trying to hide something.

[Brumby]

I think mdszy was being ironic.

[mdszy]

Just gotta say I'm thankful for this thread, it's helping me learn how to write better eBay item descriptions and include better photos! 

Just remain factual, concise and avoid trying to "tart up" the item you're selling. By all means describe the condition if it's not already clear from the photos but avoid using terms like "mint condition" because it's all relative. What might be "mint" to some people is far from the dictionary definition, especially if you're talking about a used item.

If there are faults or flaws with the item, even if it's just a scratch or there are some marks due to regular use, then say so. It's not just about what you say, but also what you don't say. If I see a listing with barely a sentence, I usually skip it because to me, the seller is being dishonest or deliberately trying to hide something.

That being said, don't go over-board, having sold thousands of items over the years, there is one thing I've noticed and that is people are stupid and don't read what they are actually bidding on. For example: Shipping -- If it's a large or bulky item that is impractical to ship, I will clearly specify in coloured, bold, underlined text that the item is for "pick up only from x location on certain days, between certain hours" but I can guarantee I'll get some muppet who will ask for a shipping estimate or they'll bid on it (and sometimes win the auction) with no intention of picking it up.

Also, don't use ebay wanker buzzwords like some of the ones mentioned in this thread. It's not only cringe-worthy but it makes you look like some kind of shonky used-car salesman. If I see a listing full of crap like that and trying to make something appear "rare" and "unique", I won't bid on it.

Final tip, take your own photos, don't just copy stock product photos from Google image search. People want to see the actual item they are bidding on, not a photoshopped marketing image. Again, it comes down to your reputation, if you're copying someone else's photos, I'll be thinking you are trying to hide something.

Absolutely. I do my best to describe the operation of the unit, take photos from all angles to show any defects, and mention if there's anything wrong with the unit, even simple cosmetic issues. I can't even imagine using stock google photos and not taking my own photos of the item!

I've also mentioned that if buyers want, I'd be more than happy to perform some test of the unit assuming it's simple enough, and provide a photo of the test being performed.

I think mdszy was being ironic.

I very honestly wasn't. I hadn't considered things like including photos of the unit in operation or not using certain phrasing that is vague and unhelpful. I wasn't being ironic!

[Brumby]

Oh.

In that case, read Halcyon's post a couple more times.