Answers to various questions:
1) The PIC18 has a single CAN controller to which you'll connect a single external CAN PHY. It will act as a single node on the CAN network. If you want two CAN nodes driven by that single PIC18, you'll need an external CAN controller as well, likely interfaced to the PIC18 via SPI.
2) The last eight bits of the 29 bit extended header is generally where nodes put the Source Address (SA), which is a unique 8-bit value for each node. This might be what was meant by "node address". This is how receiving nodes know where each message originates. The rest of the 29 bit header includes some sort of message type value (for J1939, NMMA, etc. it's often called the "PGN"). Receiving nodes typically look at the PGN and SA to decide if they care about any given message.
3) As far as a Destination Address (DA), that's protocol specific. If one is used, often it's the first byte of the eight bytes of payload data (if that PGN supports the concept of a DA at all). Remember that CAN is a broadcast network - everyone hears everything and makes their own decision about whether they care or not. Having a DA allows nodes to specify their intended target, but it doesn't prevent everyone else from receiving and acting on the message.
Others have covered hardware filtering, etc. If you're only going to have a couple of nodes on your network, you won't need to filter anything because there won't be traffic that you don't care about.