A lot of the features you mention are provided by the Dangerous prototypes bus blaster , except "standard cable pins" side but it had reconfigurable pins via change to cpld, dual UART , voltage (none,3.3v,5v, user provided down to 1.2v) and it could emulate other jtag adapters and swd as well. it's party trick is to be able to emulate two j-links , handy when you trying to fix a asus router with two jtag ports.
A real trick would to be a combo of the Bus pirate , that is emulate any 5< wire protocol sans level converters (eg rs-232/485/CAN Bus/KKline) and provide hardware jtag , with upgradable front end we can also emulate a few flash/prom programmers (hardware required for 12v stuff can be community design)
I recently worked on a device where i had JTAG for two cpu's via the busblaster +bus pirate (needed 1.8v and BB second port does only 3.3v) and two uarts (used stm32 with zenier droppers) and 1 spi eeprom chip (used stm32 with flashrom code) , this was too many devices on my desk and a issue was bound to occur and the project failed, had this been one device i dont think i would have had the issue. But yeah, i had a cable come loose while checking things and it hit 5v into a 1.8v system and job over.
darkspr1te